ScaleDB Introduces Clustered Database Based Upon Water Vapor

ScaleDB is proud to announce the introduction of a database that takes data storage to a new level, and a new altitude. ScaleDB’s patent pending “molecular-flipping technology” enables low energy molecular flipping that changes selected water molecules from H20 to HOH, representing positive and negative states that mimic the storage mechanism used on hard drive disks.

“Because we act at the molecular level, we achieve massive storage density with minimal energy consumption, which is critical in today’s data centers, where energy consumption is the primary cost,” said Mike Hogan, ScaleDB CEO. “A single thimble of water vapor provides the same storage capacity as a high-end SAN.”

The technology does have one small challenge: persistence. Clouds are not known for their persistence. ScaleDB relies on the Cumulus formation, since it is far beefier than some of those wimpy cirrus clouds. However, when deployed in the data center, the dry heat can be particularly damaging to cloud maintenance. One of the company’s patents centers around using heavy water, which resists evaporation and is therefore far more persistent than its lighter brethren. The company has already received approval from the IAEA to commercialize this technique.

This new technology considerably improves ScaleDB’s “green cred”. By greatly reducing energy consumption in data centers, it cuts their carbon footprint, leaving little more than a toeprint. Once the cloud storage—which has a 3-year half-life—is worn out, you can release it into the atmosphere. There is mingles with natural clouds making them denser and more reflective. Leading IPCC climate scientists have modeled the effects of this mingling and the scientific consensus is that it will reduce global temperatures by 5-6 degrees centigrade within 20 years (+/- 10 degrees centigrade). The company is in negotiations with Al Gore to promote this new technology, but they cannot comment on these negotiations because the mere fact that such negotiations are in fact happening is covered by a strict NDA and the even more legally binding pinky promise.

ScaleDB set out to become THE cloud database company and today’s announcement really takes that to a whole new level. The tentative name for this new database is VaporWare.